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New posts weekly.

Not always weekly.

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I Am Chris Todd, with @IamChrisTodd Humor writing worthy of reading.

Oct 22
Oct 22 Amid Massive Layoffs, CEO Assures His Employees That He Will Be Totally Fine.

Chris Todd
Headlines

After a hard year for Apexly, CEO Larry Oslwat comforts his employees with the knowledge that he is going to be just fine.

Oct 7
Oct 7 A Halloween Short Story Written Exclusively For The List App*

Chris Todd
List

An adorable Halloween short story written in list form. It has it all: Halloween candy, costumes, and a happy ending.

Sep 15
Sep 15 Things Only People Born in the 90s Would Understand

Chris Todd
List

There are just some things that only people born in the nineties would understand. How many do you 90s babies remember?

Sep 1
Sep 1 Types of Clothing, Ranked by How Many Time I'll Wear Them Without Doing Laundry

Chris Todd
List

Not all clothing gets dirty after wearing it once. Follow this guide for how frequently you should wash your clothes.

Aug 15
Aug 15 The Last 30 Minutes at Work

Chris Todd
List

The last thirty minutes of the work day is not always the most productive. This is usually how it goes.

Aug 1
Aug 1 Jokes Famous Comedians Would Make If They Were Children

Chris Todd
List

Take a time machine back to the playground for kid jokes from Jim Gaffigan, Jerry Seinfeld, Hannibal Burress and more.

Jul 24
Jul 24 Exactly 50 Words Describing This Pain in My Neck

Chris Todd
Nonfiction

When you sleep on your neck wrong, the only natural thing to do is write about how it feels within arbitrary word constraints. 

Jul 3
Jul 3 TV Show Ideas I've Had That I'm Unqualified to Write

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

These are some TV show ideas that I can't really write. And you'll never guess why! 

Jun 15
Jun 15 Things That Are OK Once, but Terrible Three Times

Chris Todd
List

More is not always better. These are the things that are good once, but three times will get you into trouble.

Jun 1
Jun 1 Factors For Determining Whether or Not To Jump Off a Bridge If Everyone Else Has Already Done So

Chris Todd
List

If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you? If you ever face this question in real life, be prepared.

May 6
May 6 Excerpt on Stream of Consciousness Writing from Third Period English

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

Stream of consciousness writing is easier than you think it is. Follow these 5 carefully crafted steps to successfully write in free form.

Apr 2
Apr 2 The Making of a Comedy Nerd, Part Two: Comedy High School

Chris Todd
Nonfiction

I consider myself a comedy nerd. But I must ask myself, how did I get here? I also must answer myself in the form of this post: part two.

Feb 22
Feb 22 Proposed Update to Include Bomb Shelters in the 2017 Realtors Associate Handbook

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

It's been an interesting 2017 for everyone, and even realty offices are feeling the changing tides of America. This memo from Browning & Associates is a prime example.

Feb 20
Feb 20 The Making of a Comedy Nerd, Part One: A Comedy Kid

Chris Todd
Nonfiction

I consider myself a comedy nerd. But I must ask myself, how did I get here? I also must answer myself in the form of this post.

Jan 17
Jan 17 Haikusies: A Tribute to Beverages and the Things that Keep them Cold

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

The plural of Haiku is not Haikusis, but you live and you learn. Here are 41 "Haikusies"

Jan 14
Jan 14 Conversations with a Bobblehead

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

A bobblehead is the ultimate yes man, and a less than ideal person to be in a relationship with.

Jan 5
Jan 5 The Critics Club

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

The Godfather in 2040 on the big screen, rewritten by the tech, makes 2016 The Godfather look like Paul Blart

Jan 3
Jan 3 When I’m Not Trying To Be Funny, I Discuss The Top Trends in Digital Marketing for 2017

Chris Todd
Nonfiction

The top trends in digital marketing for 2017 aren't sexy, but they'll bring value to your brand. 

Sep 27
Sep 27 My Hypothetical Comedy Bang! Bang! Season Six Writing Packet

Chris Todd
Nonfiction

The series finale of Comedy Bang! Bang! aired on IFC. There is no new season, but here's my writing packet anyway.

Sep 22
Sep 22 Contemporary Drivel (A Literary Cover of Steve Martin's Drivel)

Chris Todd
Humor Essay

Steve Martin wrote the humor essay Drivel for the New Yorker in 1997. In 2016, it's been unofficially updated.

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True Stories of Things I Can't Quite Remember
By Chris M. Todd
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